Allen Wittman (Assman #1) – Inventor of Liquid ASS

– Born & raised:  Northwest Ohio
– Age:  Old enough to know better . . .
– High school:  Graduated – Without honors
– College:  University of Toledo – Electrical Engineering
– Other interests & hobbies:  Drums (No. . . you can’t touch my drumset!), Woodworking, Hiking & Poop sculpting
– Favorite saying:  Ah . . . hell no!
– Favorite food:  All meat pizza
– Favorite song:  No Scrubs by TLC
– Favorite movie:  Full Metal Jacket
– Marital status:  Happily married to the Assma’am #1
– Favorite quote: “Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo!”  — Steven Wright

Andrew Masters (Assman #2) – It was my idea to sell Liquid ASS

– Native of Connersville, Indiana
– Age:  49
– High school:  Valedictorian of a school that no longer exists
– College:  Bob Jones University – BS Physics IPFW – MS Mathematics
– Other interests & hobbies:  Hiking, rock-climbing
– Favorite saying:  Oh boy . . .
– Favorite food:  Pizza King pizza and Belgium dark chocolate
– Favorite song:  More Than a Feeling by Boston
– Favorite movie:  Duck Soup starring The Marx Brothers
– Marital status:  I have a hot girlfriend.
– Favorite quote: “Those are my principles. If you don’t like them, I have others.”  — Groucho Marx