Forget the treats — Halloween pranks using Liquid ASS are much better. Liquid ASS Halloween pranks will have you howling with laughter all night long. Get the Halloween party started with a few squirts of Liquid ASS. The reactions and comments about what the hell that smell is will make this Halloween the most memorable and fun ever.
You can purchase Liquid ASS for as low as $3.78 per bottle. Simply go to the Products page of our online store.
A lot of people upon hearing about Liquid ASS think it is just like Stink Bombs or Fart Spray. This is a misconception. Stink Bombs and Fart Spray have a chemical, sulfur smell. Liquid ASS lives up to its name — it smells like ass–crack. Liquid ASS is highly–concentrated, you can apply it discreetly and quickly, and a little will last for several hours indoors. See our Suggested Uses page for other prank ideas.
Using the streaming tip version of Liquid ASS, squirt liberally with a sweeping motion over a large surface area.
On most carpeted floors, Liquid ASS is not visible and the smell lasts longer. On tile floors, squirt in the corners to minimize light reflection. (See illustrations below). A good rule of thumb is to apply Liquid ASS around the perimeter of the target area or approximately that same amount spread over the middle area.
Several significant variables will affect the performance of your Liquid ASS operation. Results will vary due to ventilation, room size, and amount applied. In general (95% of the time), when used indoors with medium ventilation, a third of a bottle will generate dry–heave–quality stench from one to three hours.
The guidelines given above combine simplicity, effectiveness, and entertainment value.
Listen to a short excerpt of WMMR's Preston and Steve (Philadelphia) commenting on the smell of Liquid ASS
(MP3, 410 KB) which is transcribed below.
Steve: [Liquid ASS] has substantially, accurately replicated a sweaty, rancid swamp-ass smell.
Preston: You know, I've smelled those chemical stink bombs before.
Steve: Yeah, they're not accurate.
Preston: They smell like, like you said, sulfur. They have kind of that egg smell. But this . . .
Steve: Not this.
Preston: . . . this literally smells like it came out of somebody's ass.
People: Direct application on the targeted person: BE CAREFUL! Liquid ASS is silent and the thin stream is hard to see or feel, but given the circumstances, it is easier to get caught. But, watching the person walk around smelling like a turd is worth the patience and effort. Applying Liquid ASS on the intended victim outside in the rain prior to coming indoors is one way to decrease chances of detection.
Elevators: Let them ride that ASS (small enclosed areas are perfect).
Door handles: Their hand will smell like they shoved it up Andre the Giant's ass.
Office chair: Put it on their chair directly; get it on their clothes indirectly.
Telephone receiver: Give them something to talk about.
Office desk: Now the brown-noser smells like the brown (apply around the rear edges).
This shit is the best.
Guys, I make a hobby of going to bars on Halloween and entering costume contests. I'm usually pretty successful. This year was no exception . . . with one minor snafu. I was kicked out of a contest due to a "horrible aroma emanating throughout the bar." I dressed as a character we all know and love from the South Park cartoon — Mr. Hanky. I figured the smell of ass would be appropriate and maybe add a dimension to the costume kind of like a 3D movie . . . more than you expected. Well, it worked. Too good perhaps. A huge bouncer struts over to me and informs me I need to go because I was stinking up the place. (It was a ritzy–titzy bar.) Although I did not win any prizes at that location, I had more fun than any prize could bring. Just hearing the grumbling of all of the patrons and then being ejected was the highlight of our whole weekend.
My sister was so impressed with your shit she wanted to take some back home to Canada. I reminded her of the strict laws for boarding airplanes and carry–on luggage. She decided to just order it on–line. I hope you guys ship this shit internationally. [We do.] The enjoyment we got is too great to put into words. Thanks.
I am recommending this shit to everyone I know (with a sense of humor).
— Mike Oxlong
To read about other pranks pulled by our customers, browse through our Feedback Page.
Go to your next Halloween party as a STINKY TURD. With the addition of a Liquid ASS "bouquet", the shock value of your Halloween turd costume will be unsurpassed. You will have everyone talking and laughing about your creative genius. Everyone will remember this year's party as the one in which you showed up as a smelly piece of poop.
What you will need for a simple Liquid ASS Halloween turd costume:
• A brown sheet
• A brown, long-sleeve shirt/sweatshirt
• Brown socks
• Brown shoes
• Several bottles of Liquid ASS (apply periodically throughout the evening — not necessarily to yourself only)
Of course, you can make your Halloween turd costume as elaborate as you like, but with these items and the shock–n–awe stench of Liquid ASS, you will be a top contender for best costume this Halloween.
Liquid ASS makes a funny Halloween gag gift. The smell of Liquid ASS really is scary.
When Philadelphia DJs Preston and Steve got hold of Liquid ASS, they pulled a prank on one of the salesman at the WMMR office. Below are two excerpts from their 22Feb2006 show.
•
Preston and Steve talking about the funny Liquid ASS prank
that CaseyBoy pulled on WMMR salesman Matt (MP3, 190 KB)
•
Sales guy Matt's thoughts
of the Liquid ASS office prank. (MP3, 113 KB)
Let me just say that when I read about Liquid Ass I had NO IDEA it was so rank smelling. It smells like a cross between runny, fresh diarrhea and dog shit. When I got it, my first victims were my coworkers. I work in a prison and, well, let's just say they were less than thrilled once they were splashed with this rotten liquid. So then (with poor judgement I might add) I decided to ASS the administration building where the warden's office is. Just one little squirt on the tile floor in front of his office and I ran like hell. About 10 minutes later, one of my coworkers whom I had gotten earlier came up and asked if I had gotten the warden's office. I asked why. He said "It is rank as hell in there." 5 minutes later another coworker came up to me and said, "Just a heads up, they are pissed in there. It smells like someone died! The warden wants to know who shit in the bathroom and his secretary is lighting candles and says she can't work in there." He said the whole admin building was in an uproar and wanted to know what the hell the smell is. Of course my emotions were rather mixed, laughing my ass off on one hand and worried about being found out on the other.
Later, I had to pull off another one at a restaurant. As we walked in, I saw where we were going to be seated and I sprayed some Liquid Ass on the floor by the waitress station where I could watch. A few minutes later I noticed the waiters sniffing their arm pits and asking the other waitresses, "Do you smell that?" So I couldn't stop there. I went to the bathroom and as I was leaving I sprayed some on the door handle so whoever left the restroom would have it on them. About 5 minutes later, we heard the whole restaurant getting louder and you could hear a few of the women shouting "OH MY WORD!" The whole place smelled like rotten ass. I called the waitress over and told her that there was something really rank in the men's room and she said, "It's in there, too?" She then told me that at first she thought someone had stepped in shit, but she was going to get the manager because she was afraid the sewer system had backed up again! I was laughing so hard when we left that I could barely drive home.
Thanks again ASSMEN. This stuff is funny as hell!
— Forget The Hurricanes, Watch Out For The Ass!
Don't forget to have plenty of Liquid ASS for April Fools' Day.
To purchase Liquid ASS, go to the Products page of our online store.
Page last updated 28April2008.
Liquid ASS
| Products
| FAQ
| Suggested Use
| Feedback
| Customers
About Us
| Contact
| Policies
| FAQ
| Links
| Made in the USA
|
Online Payments |
