Forget the treats — Halloween pranks using Liquid ASS are much better. Liquid ASS Halloween pranks will have you howling with laughter all night long. Get the Halloween party started with a few squirts of Liquid ASS. The reactions and comments about what the hell that smell is will make this Halloween the most memorable and fun ever.
You can purchase Liquid ASS for as low as $3.78 per bottle. Simply go to the Products page of our online store.
A lot of people upon hearing about Liquid ASS think it is just like Stink Bombs or Fart Spray. This is a misconception. Stink Bombs and Fart Spray have a chemical, sulfur smell. Liquid ASS lives up to its name — it smells like butt–crack. Liquid ASS is highly–concentrated, you can apply it discreetly and quickly, and a little will last for several hours indoors. See our Suggested Uses page for other prank ideas.
Using the streaming tip version of Liquid ASS, squirt liberally with a sweeping motion over a large surface area.
On most carpeted floors, Liquid ASS is not visible and the smell lasts longer. On tile floors, squirt in the corners to minimize light reflection. (See illustrations below). A good rule of thumb is to apply Liquid ASS around the perimeter of the target area or approximately that same amount spread over the middle area.
Several significant variables will affect the performance of your Liquid ASS operation. Results will vary due to ventilation, room size, and amount applied. In general (95% of the time), when used indoors with medium ventilation, a third of a bottle will generate dry–heave–quality stench from one to three hours.
The guidelines given above combine simplicity, effectiveness, and entertainment value.
Listen to a short excerpt of WMMR's Preston and Steve (Philadelphia) commenting on the smell of Liquid ASS
(MP3, 410 KB) which is transcribed below.
Steve: [Liquid ASS] has substantially, accurately replicated a sweaty, rancid swamp-ass smell.
Preston: You know, I've smelled those chemical stink bombs before.
Steve: Yeah, they're not accurate.
Preston: They smell like, like you said, sulfur. They have kind of that egg smell. But this . . .
Steve: Not this.
Preston: . . . this literally smells like it came out of somebody's ass.
Guys,
I'm having an awesome time with this "Smell–O–Hell"! I've funked out some offices and vehicles and enjoyed it (I'm going to hell for sure). Liquid ASS is priceless!
I crapped out a friend's office when I knew he'd be at lunch. I turned off the A/C while effecting a Liquid–Ass–Deployment (LAD — my friend Moe (naming no names) coined the term), hit all the base boards, and, when exiting the office, turned the A/C back on and closed the door. Returning to the scene of the LAD an hour later, my friend had the A/C on HIGH, a fan blowing, front door open, and enough air freshener deployed to choke a Febreeze sales person! He said, "Come on in, but it stinks." I said "Smells like a dog took a shit while it was getting shampooed!" So help me, I could barely stop from laughing. He had the look of someone who was not very happy to say the least!
Another case: I saw a friend of mine's truck while driving to a job site. So being the Phantom Pharter, I pulled beside it. I called him on the cell,
"Ed, where you at?"
He replied, "Pharter [my alias], where you at"?
"Parked next to your truck. What's your twenty?"
"I'm in Wetumpka. You at Weber Street?" (Weber Street is no where near Wetumpka)
"Yes, but who's driving your truck?"
"My nephew."
"OK!" I said.
Mind you, I've never met this kid before, but an LAD was effected!
I parked in adjacent parking lot to await the inevitable outcome. It was priceless. Ed's nephew opened the passenger door, took staggering steps back, opened the back door, and started throwing stuff out of the cab. (Mind you, I have always kidded Ed that if he ever cleaned out the cab of his truck, he'd find a homeless person.) This kid had stuff flying! He looked under the truck and when he went around to the driver's side ILAD (Inital Liquid-Ass-Deployment), I thought he was going to passout! (He was a tough trooper though — probably one to many keggers and we know how they turn out.) He throws more crap out of the truck (Did I mention his Uncle is not too tidy?), climbs in and drives away. But he didn't make it a 100 yards! He pulled off the side of the road with windows open leaning way out the window, cell phone to ear. (I bet he said, "Uncle Ed, your truck smells — no stinks — I can't drive it, it's that bad!") I laughed so hard I caused myself an injury!
— Phantom Pharter
This shit is the best.
Guys, I make a hobby of going to bars on Halloween and entering costume contests. I'm usually pretty successful. This year was no exception . . . with one minor snafu. I was kicked out of a contest due to a "horrible aroma emanating throughout the bar." I dressed as a character we all know and love from the South Park cartoon — Mr. Hanky. I figured the smell of ass would be appropriate and maybe add a dimension to the costume kind of like a 3D movie . . . more than you expected. Well, it worked. Too good perhaps. A huge bouncer struts over to me and informs me I need to go because I was stinking up the place. (It was a ritzy–titzy bar.) Although I did not win any prizes at that location, I had more fun than any prize could bring. Just hearing the grumbling of all of the patrons and then being ejected was the highlight of our whole weekend.
My sister was so impressed with your shit she wanted to take some back home to Canada. I reminded her of the strict laws for boarding airplanes and carry–on luggage. She decided to just order it on–line. I hope you guys ship this shit internationally. [We do.] The enjoyment we got is too great to put into words. Thanks.
I am recommending this shit to everyone I know (with a sense of humor).
— Mike Oxlong
To read about other pranks pulled by our customers, browse through our Feedback Page.
Go to your next Halloween party as a STINKY TURD. With the addition of a Liquid ASS "bouquet", the shock value of your Halloween turd costume will be unsurpassed. You will have everyone talking and laughing about your creative genius. Everyone will remember this year's party as the one in which you showed up as a smelly piece of poop.
What you will need for a simple Liquid ASS Halloween turd costume:
• A brown sheet
• A brown, long-sleeve shirt/sweatshirt
• Brown socks
• Brown shoes
• Several bottles of Liquid ASS (apply periodically throughout the evening — not necessarily to yourself only)
Of course, you can make your Halloween turd costume as elaborate as you like, but with these items and the shock–n–awe stench of Liquid ASS, you will be a top contender for best costume this Halloween.
Liquid ASS makes a funny Halloween gag gift. The smell of Liquid ASS really is scary.
When Philadelphia DJs Preston and Steve got hold of Liquid ASS, they pulled a prank on one of the salesman at the WMMR office. Below are two excerpts from their 22Feb2006 show.
•
Preston and Steve talking about the funny Liquid ASS prank
that CaseyBoy pulled on WMMR salesman Matt (MP3, 190 KB)
•
Sales guy Matt's thoughts
of the Liquid ASS office prank. (MP3, 113 KB)
People: Direct application on the targeted person: BE CAREFUL! Liquid ASS is silent and the thin stream is hard to see or feel, but given the circumstances, it is easier to get caught. But, watching the person walk around smelling like a turd is worth the patience and effort. Applying Liquid ASS on the intended victim outside in the rain prior to coming indoors is one way to decrease chances of detection.
Elevators: Let them ride that ASS (small enclosed areas are perfect).
Door handles: Their hand will smell like they shoved it up Andre the Giant's ass.
Office chair: Put it on their chair directly; get it on their clothes indirectly.
Telephone receiver: Give them something to talk about.
Office desk: Now the brown-noser smells like the brown (apply around the rear edges).
Don't forget to have plenty of Liquid ASS for April Fools' Day.
To purchase Liquid ASS, go to the Products page of our online store.
Page last updated 11October2008.
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